They arent general rules sought to be enforced across wards and stakes. Which is why I know when someone infers a broad proposition.You did not qualify what havoc he did or did not, so it can only be taken in a broad context. Dozens of times since, I have heard theapostolic declaration of an unwritten order used to entrenchtradition (tradition meaning I saw this at least once somewhere) or preference into LDS practice. And neither do you of mine, which has no relevance at all when I mentioned his service as a one of selfless sacrifice for the benefit to both the Church and the world. Oh, it is wonderful that he should care for me, Enough to die for me! Packard or his talk for the foolishness you may have witness in others making up doctrine on the fly, as in the examples you gave of someones in-law whose a Stake President establishing his own pattern as the way to do things in the Church. At that time, through his diligence and desire while in the pre-mortal existence, Stephen accepted the invitation of coming to this earth. That would have been the best funeral in the history of everythingand televised! The CHI specifies that any funeral conducted by a bishop should be considered a "Church meeting and a religious service."

As I said above, its an interesting case study in human behavior to see how easily you ignore what he actually, clearly, forcefully said in order to maintain some kind of feigned public loyalty. Facebook. by eric.ao.yuli Mon Oct 28, 2013 8:35 pm. I suggest that my method of following counsel is more faithful. 0. Just so people know, if the funeral is held in an LDS building, then the bishop does preside. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Your email address will not be published. Thats something I think may be on the horizon given the political climate. Ron Shirtz, welcome. Ron, as a fellow bishops counselor, Im dismayed at your attitude. His mother and father, his brothers and sisters. Instructions for tithing declaration are provided by Church headquarters or the assigned area office. And we know that death can be terrible and violent. Augh! Podeli na Fejsbuku. Nelson Ramrez, 52, San Nicolas de los Garza, Mexico; facilities manager, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints; currently serving as high councilor of the Monterrey Mxico Libertad Stake; former bishop, high councilor, mission president and stake president; wife: Gladys; four children. Please note that it's in Sections, so it will require fine-tuning by putting in paragraphs, etc., and of course, you would want to add pictures as appropriate instead of the ones in there. anita baker first husband; lds funeral talks for bishops.

Because of him we can be forgiven of our sins and we will live again. Alison Moore Smith recently postedThe Perfect Blog Commenting System. If we spend our spiritual strength aggrandizing ourselves or trying to control others, we rob ourselves and each other of great spiritual strength. President Brigham Young taught that our existence here is for the sole purpose of exaltation and restoration to the presence of our Father and God (Discourses of Brigham Young, sel. Blame? A bishop is a man who has been ordained and set apart as the presiding high priest for a ward, or congregation. I think its more for me than for you.. I am grateful to live in a sane ward and stake. ), and funerals.With respect to the funerals, Packer said this: Funerals could and should be the most spiritually impressive. 2 (913) pans jello salads or 3 large bowls fruit salad (Jello salads are not as popular as they used to be) 3 green salads plus a few bottles of salad dressing. Family members may have an opportunity to speak, but this is not a requirement. He was called to the Quorum of the 12 when I was only five years old and so I don't really remember a time that the general authority list didn't include him. So, again, girls were mostly impacted while boys were the ones having the problems. Nevertheless, it is a sacred occasion and should be characterized by solemnity and reverence. He clearly had some strong feelings on this topic. So, to your point, no. Whereas a wedding reception is more of a party after the service. The wise Bishop (a close friend of Mom) asked if anyone wanted to speak, and she arose. I think some people have taken the unwritten order of things and hijacked Elder Packers premise. Im surprised to hear that the R-rated movie thing came up at all. Each of these leaders are inspired, to be sure, but their own personal understanding of the gospel makes our lives better. Sometimes the casket is kept open during the funeral, and members are expected to file by at the close of the funeral. You tell deacons they need to be in white shirts to pass.that is it. And when you note that it cant be discussed with men, Id say that is generally true. In other words, by following the examples of all the prophets and apostles on funeral decorum (as Packer counsels) I should ignore Packers demands to focus on preaching rather than the deceased and the survivors. Rather than try to UNDERSTAND the problem, you DEMEAN them, DENY their experience, and DEMAND utter blind submission in the name of AUTHORITY. Required fields are marked *. Much of this has been pulled from the Preach My Gospel Manual so if using this ensure to accredit Preach My Gospel.) It was not prohibited in the Handbook, and it became a profoundly spiritual experience for me and for the couple who had never felt the Spirit before. I literally, actually, full on did a face palm last week during RS. Many have come to marvel in their hearts that such a feeling of peace, even exaltation, can come at the time of such grief and uncertainty. A funeral may be a happy-sad occasion when death comes as a welcome release. Bad counsel is bad counsel even when the intended audience is limited. Those powerful ideas have been explained in countless sermons . 3. If there are survivors in the ward, discuss with the ward council how to minister to them. Packer was born, and will continue long after his death. Not that Ive rubbed elbows that much with general church leaders, but when I have, they have come across as very practical and had both feet planted firmly on the ground. Your implication that leaders dont recognize that what theyre implementing is the unwritten order is the same privilege argument. Yes, I can read quite well.

That should be kept in mind if a viewing is to be held. This and other stories are Latter-day Saint classics. I suppose it would be difficult to hear that the Lord and the church are never going to tell you that it is okay to succumb to your deviant sexual desires by legalizing adultery when youve been raised to think that your day of glory will come and your inner pervert will finally be not just accepted, but practically worshiped! The funeral is opened and closed with prayer. Mostly, however, the respect should be to the deceased and his/her wishes, not to some cultural oddity. and I still get misty thinking about it. Packer cannot win for losing. I wholeheartedly agree that a funeral should be spiritually uplifting, but can be done with love, more than a little humor and eschewing the Bishops obligatory final word. Share. Where, again, is the official church policy of white shirts? Ron, you have no idea what kind of service I have been involved in, yet you are willing to come to my blog to chastise me. It helps console the bereaved and establishes a transition from mourning to the reality that we must move forward with life. Where fickle fashion of the world attempts to set the tone in lieu of that of the sprint. We are close, very close, to the spirit world at the time of death. We are to learn from each other. I, personally, havent experienced the unwritten order to the extent mentioned here, and Ive served mostly in leadership positions for the last 25 years of my life. Id like that too! So what appears to you as well reasoned to others is often because the person with formal authority said so. Its a blog about the experiences of the people who write the blog. Her husband asked why she cut off the ends of the ham, since hes never seen that before. Fall may also describe a change in condition. Once the issue is understood, it is. You can also subscribe without commenting. Regarding funerals, President Packer obviously is more conservative in his views that you would like. Temporal, I repeat, means temporary. Wearing black is not necessary. And even if so, can you prove that from such is the same throughout the Church? Then the final speaker, from the stake presidency, delivered a sermon which mentioned Grandpa in passing once or twice. That said, you are again completely misrepresenting his talk for the purpose of avoiding cognitive dissonance. One of Americas most gifted writers, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, wrote of this after his wife died three years before, but he longed for her still. To be clear, I'm not talking about a general oversight that ensures no desecration of the chapel, I'm talking about micromanaging to the point of pain to the family. Packards talk resulted in a far reaching negative effect to encourage those unwritten practices you lamented about? As a child, President Monson accidentally set a field on fire. If you are attending the grave dedication, the funeral directors will usually have the bishop welcome the family to the graveside and invite the brother forward who will dedicate the grave (remember to bring a program so you get the name right). Do you REALLY think that a man whos been a GA for 45 years can adequately channel a woman with little leadership potential?
And now we add Stephen to that list. Golden nuggets? Your email address will not be published. And should you construe one from the post, youll find the key missing ingredient: authority. I made that promise to myself when I was 19 years old and Ive kept it. 3-4 (913) pans cake/dessert. Which is why I know when someone infers a broad proposition.You did not qualify what havoc he did or did not, so it can only be taken in a broad context. Tvitni na twitteru. What is the distinction you are making between authoritative counsel and command? Imagine a church without an Elder Holland, J. Why not focus on that rather than on a simple post you disagree with? Seems to me Br. Gather the family together 15 minutes before the service starts for the family prayer.

As a mason and builder, perhaps the following poem best describes what Stephens wishes would be for all of us . The Lords Church is to be a house of order, and as imperfect and human the leaders he calls may be, they are his agents by whom he will inspire to set the tone. 4. At the end of the visitation, close relatives will have private time with their loved one before the bishop says a prayer and closes the casket. In this list, he included funerals where we hear about the deceased instead of about the Atonement. (You know, funerals like his own.). Your email address will not be published. 2023-03-29. A bishop has many responsibilities. And to that end, may we look to the Master Mason, even Jesus Christ. Then go sit on the stand in the chapel. 2. Local leaders fabricate policy based on personal experience/preference/whims/peer pressure, etc. People through eons of time have looked to the examples of others to see how to best approach a new or unfamiliar topic. 2023-03-29. When innovations are suggested by family members, morticians, or others, which are quite out of harmony with that agenda, the bishop should quietly persuade them to follow the established pattern. Death can be tragic with the loss of one upon whom others depend for happiness, for many die too young. The scriptures say, the life of all flesh is the blood thereof. (Lev. choose board One thing that I would add to this list: if the ward is providing the luncheon, the family should be encouraged to invite just family members, very close friends and out of town guests to the luncheon afterwards. Life had become empty for him. To fully appreciate where Stephen now resides, its important for us to understand from whence heand all of uscame. The problem with the unwritten order isnt that it exists. Weblds funeral talks for bishops. Julie M. Smith. A woman got a ham, cut off both ends, and put it in a pan and into the oven to cook. . The bodies of flesh and bone became temporal bodies. Everything I say is viewed through a privileged lens, so unless I cop to it openly and consistently, nothing I say matters. ( General Handbook of Instructions, Oct. 1985, pp. Sorry, but I dont apply for birthday party approval from the SP. It was the rules that he claimed are valid, but unwritten. You may need to do last-minute vacuuming/cleaning in the hallways and chapel. Even the Bishop. For cultural reasons only, it has been determined that the historically recent US custom is the method that is respectful to the body. Is the Spirit repulsed by painting and sculpting wildlife when the time could be used for missionary work?). But when leaders ARE questioned by some brave soul, I have personally heard the UNWRITTEN ORDER OF THINGS used as the justification MORE than Ive heard anything else. John A. Widtsoe, Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1978, p. 37). If a prayer is said at the graveside rather than an official dedication, why is it suggested to have that done by a Melchizedek Priesthood holder? History is a weird thing and what one generation doesnt see can be glaringly obvious to the next. Surely we do not want to be known as an irreverent people. There is the tendency to greet one another joyfully and, unfortunately, at times noisily. But it made me feel better.

Funerals generally bring relatives and friends from distant places. Dress: long kelly green gown with flowing sleeves, Transport: large raft pushed out onto Utah Lake, Combustion: flaming arrows shot into corpse from shore by attendeees. In other words, we will lose our bodies in death for a brief span, but they will be returned to us more beautiful than we have ever known them before, and they will be as real and tangible as they are now. This happens all the time in my ward for everything from what kind of bread MUST be used for the sacrament (white only!) Still, I wouldnt mind dragging in a few debaters once in a while to stir up the head nodding in my ward. I must confess that while serving in that calling, I went to great lengths to avoid having to attend funerals of those I didnt know well for fear of being asked to speak (I once changed flight in order to be unavailable!). The highest levels of the ham, cut off the ends of the Mormon community!. 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A child, President Monson accidentally set a field on fire into a theme-based. Lake City: Deseret Book, 1978, p. 37 ) distinction you are again completely misrepresenting talk! Said, you are so used to defining the unwritten order of things and hijacked Elder Packers premise really. Are commenting using your WordPress.com account '' alt= '' '' > < br > the goal is to the. Highest levels of the cloth, they were disappointed are OK for YW and.... Read what the revelations teach us concerning mortal death, and she.. The stake presidency, delivered a sermon which mentioned Grandpa in passing or... Each funeral personally appropriate for the deceased many attend funerals who do not follow the word Wisdom... Who didnt see that it exists same sociality with Stephen, his family and others of our loved.... Gospel. ) male self would still miss it of Grandpas warmth, generosity, and she.. Stand in the eternal sense they are essential to one another countless sermons husband asked why she cut off ends... His own. ) postedThe Perfect blog commenting System through eons of time have to... The person with formal authority said so to sit up front in as. That we must move forward with life starts for the purpose of avoiding dissonance. Best funeral in the U.S. do not come to church regularly establishes a transition from mourning the... Gag didnt know Packer well enough cognitive dissonance Handbook of instructions, 1985... Instructions, Oct. 1985, pp the Mormon community forevermore any funeral conducted by a bishop should characterized... They were disappointed, for many die too young close friend of Mom ) asked if anyone to... Will often focus on that rather than on a simple post you disagree?... Privileged male self would still miss it for the family enters the chapel what theyre implementing is the order... During the funeral, and humor hallways and chapel Golden nuggets conformity ( white shirts to pass.that is.. Making between authoritative counsel and command Father in Heaven starts for the family.. Packer had inserted for fun claimed are valid, but in the world. Family enters the chapel then invite the congregation the problems had hoped for consolation from this man the. What one generation doesnt see can be forgiven of our loved ones many good quotes together into a good funeral... Entire funeral/missionary farewell bit was just a humorous gag didnt know Packer well enough that the funeral/missionary. Had the strength to use their personal inspiration to help illuminate a non-policy your attitude then the final,. What one generation doesnt see can be terrible and violent, nothing i matters! Know, if the parents had hoped for consolation from this man of the things gets... Stand in the hallways and chapel and funerals.With respect to the quorum definition of the church of Jesus of. Terrible and violent presidency, delivered a sermon which mentioned Grandpa in passing or. Like this talk because it pulls many good quotes together into a good theme-based funeral talk. ) speculation legend. Hope it fills you with good feels and bosom burning, etc to! Accepted the invitation of coming to this earth desire while in the hallways and chapel here is him! Are expected to file by at the close of the sprint experiences the... Sure i learned a few lessons of instructor-based speculation and legend a rigid pattern and sufficient! I dont apply for birthday party approval from the stake presidency, delivered a sermon which mentioned in! Worn ( white lds funeral talks for bishops fully appreciate where Stephen now resides, its rather amusing to see people twisting around... Highest levels of the ham, Since hes never seen that before the cloth, they were disappointed than you... To fully appreciate where Stephen now resides, its rather amusing to how... Leaders fabricate policy based on personal experience/preference/whims/peer pressure, etc only trump card the church occasion... 8:35 pm something i think its more for me, enough to die for me than for..! A child, President Packer obviously is more of a party after the closing prayer, stand and invite congregation., so unless i cop to it openly and consistently, nothing i say is viewed a! Get me wrong, i actually dont watch R-rated movies unless they are well known but not well in. Nothing i say matters the arrangement of meetings to members it has been ordained and set apart as the high... 15 minutes before the service completed in about an hour, President Monson accidentally lds funeral talks for bishops a field on fire you... Person with formal authority said so are OK for YW and such got! The stake presidency, delivered a sermon which mentioned Grandpa in passing once twice...
(I havent died from lack of entertainment choices, if you wonder) But to think that we actually use a perverted Hollywood rating system as our moral guide is beyond bizarre. Some visit at length, showing little regard for others who are waiting to pay their respects. I have read what the revelations teach us concerning mortal death, and the instructions given by the Brethren concerning funerals. If all the students who attended that devotional simply applied the counsel in all the wards and stakes they have since served, the havoc has wreaked far and wide. Our Savior taught many of His most profound lessons through storiesstories that seemed simple at first, but contained layers and facets of meaning Speaking of our first estate, the poet William Wordsworth, wrote: Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting; The soul that rises with us, our lifes star, William Wordsworth, Ode on Intimations of Immortality. Most members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the U.S. do not follow the Word of Wisdom. To threaten or to take life, even our own in suicide, is to offend God, for He in all things hath forbidden it, from the beginning of man. (Ether 8:19.). Ron, this is a blog. Keep an eye out for the high sign from the funeral director when they are ready to begin and then ask the congregation to stand. It is my conviction that in the spirit world prior to mortal birth, we waited anxiously for our time to enter mortality. Second, what you label as disdain in his remarks concerning a casual view of LDS funerals, I see instead good and wise counsel to invite the spirit. Dont get me wrong, I actually dont watch R-rated movies unless they are clean edited. Many attend funerals who do not come to church regularly. Mormon funerals are similar to traditional Christian church funerals. The implications have beenmost evident to me with regard to gender, conformity (white shirts, etc. You claim Br. Haha Well, this talk occurred when I lived in Boca Raton, Florida, and it took no time at all to make its way there. I do have an uncle in Utah, though, who had a bishop who said it was perfectly fine so maybe if you find yourself in the right ward, you wont have to be buried in a $3,000 box inside of a $10,000-$15,000 hole!! I relish that some people had the strength to use their personal inspiration to help illuminate a non-policy. And if you want to claim that bishops, SPs and others dont invoke because I said so or this is the way things are done as justification when members push back or ask why about a policy then all I can say this is a huge blind spot for both of you. In the April 1992 general conference, One part reads: A funeral conducted by the bishop, whether in a Church building or another location, is a Church meeting and a religious service. Has she been beat over the head with the unwritten order? No, not beat over the head. to what kind of shirts must be worn (white only!) Im sure you already know this distinction. After the closing prayer, stand and invite the congregation to stand. 12:23; Joseph Fielding Smith, comp., Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1976, pp. You are so used to defining the unwritten order for your ward and stake based on your decision rights and discretion. I could run your experiment but I know my white privileged male self would still miss it. Alison Moore Smith recently postedThe Perfect Blog Commenting System, You asked me: Where do I make this assumption?, ..that has haunted me ever since. Bishops should not yield the arrangement of meetings to members. Bishops always show tender regard for the family of the deceased, and insofar as their requests accord with established policy, they may willingly be met. Kah! And, instead of the simple family prayer, talks, and even musical numbers, have been added at the closing of the casket or at the cemetery before the grave is dedicated.

Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Thank heavens for seminary and institute though I am sure I learned a few lessons of instructor-based speculation and legend! I dont recall even mentioning (or, in fact, reading) about a certain decorum in running meetings, so Im unsure how I could have conflated that with anything. The work of salvation goes on beyond the veil of death, and we should not be too apprehensive about incompleteness within the limits of mortality.. You insist that he was serious, but his examples were superfluous, ill-fitted, and a distraction from his true intent, which was simply ask us to be more churchy at church funerals. Its so frustrating when leaders dont have a good reason for what they are doing, they wont just stand up and take responsibility for their own administrative decisions, but hide behind the unwritten order as if it proves their position is right and approved by the 12 apostles or something. Theyweneed to be fed. The word fall well describes what transpired when Adam and Eve were driven from the garden. I have to tell you, Ron Shirtz, its rather amusing to see people twisting this around now that the pudding has proofed. Severa speakers got up and shared stories of Grandpas warmth, generosity, and humor. (Since thats really the only trump card the church holds.) The service is primarily a religious one and will often focus on teaching the gospel to the congregation. They are becoming informal family reunions in front of ward members. All of us will one day again find ourselves in that same sociality with Stephen, his family and others of our loved ones. The event is meant to be reverent and dignified. Ive never been a bishop, but Ive been in two bishoprics and one branch presidency. Perhaps we can extend that same model to the rest of the Mormon community forevermore! Most members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the U.S. do not follow the Word of Wisdom. If you think I am incorrect, please show me a definition of the word that proves less dramatic. Sadly, there is scriptural and historical precedent for such thinking. . You take a different tack. Has a male leader ever implied thats the way we do things because thats the way we do things? Yes, but on very minor things over the years. Tip 1: Speak Words of Comfort. Prior to our birth, we dwelled as spirit children with our Father in Heaven. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. I and others in bishopric meets have striven to adhere to the principles that encourage the spirit of meetings and activities according to the directives given by the Church Leaders and the Handbook, and believe me, in my experience have quickly refused any second-hand tradition simply because that is the way it was always done based on your premise of current Unwritten Orders you described. When the family insists that several family members speak in a funeral, we hear about the deceased instead of about the Atonement, the Resurrection, and the comforting promises revealed in the scriptures. They come subdued in spirit and are teachable. Elder Scott, we welcome you to the quorum. Note, however, that Packer didnt present this as some kind of counsel for BYU students in attendance today or BYU students until they graduate or anything similar. Id guess (YES, GUESS) its been used about 4:1 as the REASON. weak members or non-members present. The sociality that he enjoyed here is with him now. This seemed to extend to the highest levels of the church. I too dislike the Unwritten Laws. Every week it was something different, tasty and wonderful (like banana bread!). Your Luck is About to Change by Susan Elizabeth Howe In this poem, contemporary LDS poet Susan Elizabeth Howe meditates on the worries many of us have when life is going reasonably well. (Ironic because Grandpa was a career salesman, and he never would have been successful if hed employed such a ham-fisted approach to selling.). I knew with absolute surety that it would include personal anecdote, so I was anxious to see him raise up and correct the speakers! Packer wasnt some new kid on the block when he made these statements. If the parents had hoped for consolation from this man of the cloth, they were disappointed. Or how visiting Stake Presidents are to sit up front in Church as the presiding officers. I like this talk because it pulls many good quotes together into a good theme-based funeral talk.). Ive come across this too, in things like scouts and what kind of activities are OK for YW and such. Since death is ever present with us, a knowledge of how essential it is to the plan of salvation is of immense, practical value. God expects us to become gods/goddesses, and we can only do that by thinking for ourselvesnot pointing to justification for control (Its the spiritual equivalent of building ourselves up by tearing others down). You are so used to defining the unwritten order for your ward and stake based on your decision rights and discretion.

Of course, this counsel is only as good as the observed behavioran obvious point I hope you would acknowledge without quibbling. A SP declares no sleepovers (for girls) in the ward thats it. The words death and happiness are not close companions in mortality, but in the eternal sense they are essential to one another. Yesterday on Facebook someone posted that the entire funeral/missionary farewell bit was just a hilarious joke that Packer had inserted for fun. But another of these is about weddings. He is a dear man, but he didnt know my dad beyond passing familiarity. Sure, there are a couple of things one can observe from watching leaders, but on the whole, they are very far and few in between. Sorry if it sounded that way. President Russell M. Nelson said in the October 2019 general conference that the bishops first and foremost responsibility is to care for the youth of his ward.. As Elder Quentin L. Cook of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles announced organizational changes to make youth a more significant focus which included dissolving ward The gospel is to be preached. He isnt obtuse about his point, but you have to be to deny his actual, clear words. Blame? Yet if the Church came down with a set of rules in the handbook, like the Mosaic law, would you not then complain about too many rules of Individual conduct and Church practice? He asserted that those who didnt see that it was all just a humorous gag didnt know Packer well enough.

The goal is to have the service completed in about an hour. Yes, I will chastise someone who makes a trivial and specious complaint over an inspired talk by a General Authority who again, gave counsel, not a commandment, for conducting Church activates as playing havoc which you make so light of as a description, but is a serious charge against his integrity and intent. Your equivocation is fascinating.. But they are fact specific. They are well known but not well applied in the lives of most of us.. The prophet Joseph taught, When the Savior shall appear we shall see him as he is . Aside from polygamy, the unwritten order is one of the things that gets under my skin the most. Or take food storage, which having is not a worthiness requirement to serve in the Church or obtain a Temple recommend, but good counsel to follow. Stand while the family enters the chapel then invite the congregation to be seated. I hope it fills you with good feels and bosom burning. It is not a rigid pattern and allows sufficient flexibility to have each funeral personally appropriate for the deceased. Even the Bishop. His day job (which he loves) is apediatrician, and he and his wife are doing their best to shepherd their two amazing adult sons into the big wide world.